Author: DW Admin

If you’re one of the millions of parents staying home with your children during this challenging season in our world, there are things you can do to help ease tension and stress, as you try juggling work and family.

Normally, working parents are used to waking up early, getting themselves and their children ready for the day which includes preparing breakfast, driving them to school, then heading to the office to tackle their work day.

But for the past few days, parents are having to switch gears by no longer having to drive kids to and from school – their homes have now been transformed into classrooms and workspaces. This new set-up can become overwhelming for parents who need to work and now are faced with serving as temporary educators for their school-aged kids.

Dayanara Santiago, a coordinator for Methodist Healthcare Ministries’ Parenting Program, said once she implemented a daily schedule for her children, it added structure to their day. She has four children, ages 18, 12, 13, and 8, at home. She said she and her husband work together to keep their children on track with school work.

Amanda Greer, supervisor for Methodist Healthcare Ministries’ Parenting Program, agrees. She said it’s important to have a game plan for each day. While her children are not school-age yet, they require plenty of attention throughout the day. She and her husband collaborate with each other so they can focus on work, while caring for their two little ones, ages three and 18-months.

The following is a list of tips, prepared by Amanda and Dayanara that can help others, as parents across our community and world learn how to adapt to a “new normal” way of life:

• Implementing a daily or weekly schedule/routine and stick to it.
• Preparing healthy meals and snacks. Try preparing meals the night before so you save time during the day.
• Scheduling nap and/or quiet time.
• Staying connected with other parents for support and ideas. Find out what’s working for them and share what’s working for you.
• Staying connected with your child’s teachers and school districts for important school work updates.
• Going outdoors for recreation time – basketball, volleyball, etc.
• Coordinating weekly Bible studies for the family and allowing time for children to express their feelings about the current situation.
• Creating movie nights, watching reruns of your favorite shows and letting children participate in selecting movies and shows.
• Playing board games or trying new online games for the whole family.
• Challenging children to read books and rewarding them for the number of books read each week – check with your local school for free online books available to students.
• Engaging children with fun hobbies like painting, coloring, or creating a garden and planting seeds. There are a variety of Do-It-Yourself (DIY) ideas and guides available online.
• Set aside time during your day for a daily devotional.
• Utilize YouTube videos for ideas on Bible topics for kids.
• Encourage children to write letters or create greeting cards for sending to their grandparents, as well as seniors who are living in a nursing home.
• Assign children to help with housecleaning, especially in their rooms (making their beds every day).
• If you have pets, ask your children to help bathe and feed them.
• Go for walks with your children or get your bikes out and go riding.
• Communicating with your spouse or others helping you at home is key in staying on track with daily tasks. By communicating, you’ll be able to tackle your work projects and attend virtual meetings, as needed to get your work done.

“My husband and I find that it’s extremely important to keep the communication line open between us so that we are on the same page,” explained Amanda. “Talking with each other about what’s on our minds, whether its frustration or anything else, will help prevent miscommunication or arguments from occurring.”

Dayanara said it’s important to talk to your kids about what’s happening in our world. Being honest and open is best. “I take time to listen to my kids and their concerns. If they ask me about the virus and how it is impacting our world, I will try to explain as best I can. By doing this, it will help ease their fears and worries.”

She also said that if your child needs help with a school assignment, allow yourself to stop working and go help them. “If my child needs help, I’ll go and help them. If I see that it’s going to take longer, we will skip it and come back to it later.”

Amanda said, “You have to become strategic in how you manage your day. Do your best to stay on track but also be realistic. Don’t’ be hard on yourself.”

“It’s getting easier as the days pass. We are coming along as a family. On the positive side, I love that we are together and dedicating more time with each other and I’m saving gas since I don’t have to drive anywhere, except for necessary items. I know that God is with us through this time,” said Dayanara.

News updates about the coronavirus (COVID-19) are happening all day and every day. All you need to do is turn on your TV or connect to your preferred social channel, and you’ll learn the latest on the situation impacting our world.

The news can become overwhelming – causing stress, fear, and anxiety in these uncertain times. These feelings can escalate quickly if not effectively managed, according to Celina Gonzalez, a behavioral health counselor at Methodist Healthcare Ministries.

She said as more individuals are also having to make home their new work sites – juggling work and family at the same time can lead to an increase in stress.

“It’s important to learn how to cope, especially if you’re working from home surrounded by family staying with you,” said Gonzalez. “People start to worry about the future and start to become fearful and anxious. There are things that we can all do to help us manage these emotions.”

Gonzalez has put together a list of tips that can help individuals and families manage stress and anxiety, while at home. The list includes the following:

• Self-Care
  • Go for daily walks and don’t forget to take deep breaths along the way (remember to practice social distancing during your walks). Take your furry friend with you, if you can.
  • Get plenty of sleep (at least eight hours).
  • Commit to praying/meditating at least 10 minutes during your day. Daily devotionals are always helpful.
  • Listen to soothing music during short breaks throughout your day.
  • Don’t skip meals – choose healthy options for meals and snacks.
  • Keep a journal of your day-to-day tasks and/or prayers.
  • Drink plenty of water to stay hydrated.
  • Protect your health and the health of your loved ones by staying home.
  • Dance with your kids and other family members to help stay positive! Get out those fun tunes and start moving. This is also great exercise!
  • Catch up on reading. If you have a book you’ve been trying to read, now is a good time to start.
  • Start a new hobby. Watch stories on Facebook, Instagram, or YouTube for fun tutorials and ideas.
  • Create a movie night with your family. Make a list of the movies you’d like to watch together!
  • Limit your time on social media. Also, try following only positive and encouraging social channels, as well as credible news sources.

• Stay Connected with Others
  • Use technology to stay connected with loved ones – FaceTime, email, a quick phone call, or consider brief chats through communication platforms with friends and family living away from you.
  • Write notes or letters of encouragement to friends, family, neighbors or church family.
  • Share fun online games or pull-out board games, if you have them around the house – practice social distancing.
  • Create an online photo album
  • Share tasty and fun recipes with each other. Maybe start videotaping some cooking demos of your favorite meals and share with others on social media.
  • Do some spring cleaning around the house and save for donating later to those in need of clothing and/or household items.

Gonzalez said you can successfully manage your thoughts and actions by practicing a variety of healthy ways to cope with stress and anxiety. She says you can be as creative as you want in making your surroundings positive and calming, as we work together as a community through this challenging season.

“Taking good care of yourself means you will be able to better care for those you love and cherish,” she added. “Make time for yourself, as we all take one day at a time.”

Celina Gonzalez serves as a behavioral health counselor at Methodist Healthcare Ministries’ Dixon Health & Wellness Center in San Antonio.

Stay informed by visiting our COVID-19 Information Hub for important updates, resources, and support.

One of Methodist Healthcare Ministries’ main focuses moving forward is to support resilient families. According to the Buncombe ACE Learning Collaborative, resilience is the ability to adapt well, or “bounce back” in response to difficult life events. When families experience hard things and stressors, says Buncombe, they need good experiences and resources to help balance the scale. That’s where trauma-informed care comes in.

First, some definitions:

• What are ACEs? ACEs are Adverse Childhood Experiences, traumatic events that disrupt a child’s healthy development and change the way their brains and bodies respond to stress. ACEs may include abuse, neglect, exposure to mental illness and addiction, and witnessing violence at home or in the community. ACEs are common! Some 60 percent of adults report having at least one ACE in their history and 25 percent of adults report experiencing three or more ACEs.
• What is Trauma-Informed Care? Trauma-Informed Care, or TIC, is an approach that understands and recognizes the role of trauma. TIC practitioners ask the client, “What happened to you?” instead of “What’s wrong with you?” TIC is focused on creating a safe, trusted environment that will not re-traumatize people. It is focused on helping ACE survivors build resilience and develop coping strategies.

Why does Methodist Healthcare Ministries care about ACEs? ACEs are an underlying cause of many painful, destructive and expensive health problems. They are associated with struggling, rather than thriving. Families cannot be resilient if caught in a cycle of trauma. Communities cannot thrive if families are suffering. If we could help people unpack their ACEs baggage and become more resilient, they could live happier, healthier lives.

Negative health outcomes associated with ACES can last throughout the life span. The more ACEs somebody experienced as a child, the higher their risk of various co-morbidities throughout their adult lives. Four or more ACEs are associated with: A twelvefold risk of suicide attempts; an eigthfold risk of alcoholism; a fivefold risk of chronic depression. But it’s not limited to behavioral health issues. There’s also a fivefold risk of perpetuating domestic violence, a fourfold risk of COPD, a twofold risk of any cancer, a twofold risk of heart attack or stroke and at least a twofold risk of obesity. ACEs are also tied to risk for general life dissatisfaction; approximately 67 percent of life dissatisfaction in the U.S. population is probably attributable to ACEs.

The link between ACEs and health problems was originally discovered by a physician in a weight-loss clinic, trying to figure out why patients who seemed to be doing well on BMI reduction suddenly started regaining their weight. His follow-up study found that emotional abuse was a strong predictor of obesity. Frequent verbal abuse increased the risk of having a BMI of 40+ by 88 percent. Frequent physical abuse increased that risk by 71 percent and sexual abuse increased it by 42 percent.

How is Methodist Healthcare Ministries philanthropically involved in trauma-informed care? Methodist Healthcare Ministries' community grants team has been involved in the ACEs/TIC approach since 2018, inspired by an internal screening of the film, Resilience. Our philanthropic involvement focuses on three initiatives:

1. South Texas Trauma-Informed Care Consortium and setting standards: The Consortium celebrated its one-year anniversary in September 2019.

• Methodist Healthcare Ministries is actively involved in the Consortium, and making a grant, to help set standards for TIC. The Consortium is a cross-sector collaboration, with 12 workgroups and over 100 organizations represented. Dr. Edward Dick (senior vp of integrated health services) and Anne Connor   (director of community grants) both serve on the steering committee and are co-chairs of different workgroups. Chris Yanas (director of governmental affairs) serves on the workgroup focused on communication and advocacy.
• The Philanthropy Workgroup created guiding principles for trauma-informed funding, which include “Don’t fund programs that will re-traumatize people.”
• It became apparent to the entire consortium that standards and training are needed to transform TIC from a buzzword to a reality. In response, the Consortium is working to create a unique and powerful solution that addresses teh need in Texas.

2. Texas Association of Community Health Centers (TACHC) and Transforming FQHCs: Methodist Healthcare Ministries helped to facilitate funding for a huge opportunity for system change.

• TACHC launched an initiative in 2019 to start converting all FQHCs (Federally Qualified Health Centers) in Texas to Trauma-Informed Care Centers. The program involves multiple, in-depth, ongoing activities such as training, podcasts linking ACES to current events, and peer meetings, to engage each cohort of community health centers. The program uses PDSA-like “decision points” to review and improve the program before starting each new cohort. The goal is to treat TIC as a “universal precaution,” assuming that every patient who walks in has probably experienced some level of ACEs. FQHCs will create an atmosphere of trust and caring, from front-desk staff to medical providers.
• Methodist Healthcare Ministries is a voting member of the Texas Behavioral Health Funders’ Collaborative (TBHFC). TACHC received a $100,000 grant for 2019 and another $100,000 grant for 2020, from TBHFC, for this TIC transformation project. Both grants were initiated by requests from Methodist Healthcare Ministries, leveraging the organization’s membership dues in TBHFC 4:1. 

3. Building Funder Awareness: The more funders who understand ACEs and TIC, the more support there will be for programs that build resilience.

• Anne Connor serves as one of the co-chairs of the Philanthropy Workgroup of the South Texas Trauma-Informed Care Consortium, and is actively recruiting additional grantmakers to this workgroup.
• She also serves on the planning committee of the San Antonio Area Funders’ Group. She was instrumental in bringing the 45-minute film about ACES, Resilience, to a screening for about 40 grant funders at the February 2019 meeting of the Funders’ Group.

Resilient Families: Methodist Healthcare Ministries aims to create the conditions in which families in our service area can be resilient, contributing to thriving communities and moving toward health equity. Trauma-Informed Care is a critical part of that effort.

On January 11, 1995, Methodist Healthcare Ministries of South Texas, Inc. was founded and began its mission of “Serving Humanity to Honor God.”We are incredibly proud of where we’ve been and excited for what’s ahead. We look forward to the future, as we continue to support resilient families and thriving communities across South Texas.